Change can be scary. Change can involve diving into the unknown. I don’t know about you, but change is tough for me…even good change.
I like a schedule. I like knowing when I’m exercising, when I’ll be at work and when I’ll be eating meals, because if I don’t, some of those things don’t happen. Welcome to my life currently, where schedules do not exist!
It sounds like a ton of rest and rejuvenation, but I’ll be honest, it hasn’t totally been that lately.
Let’s back up a bit – my husband and I thought we’d move away from DFW in about 4-5 years, but the Lord had something else planned. Everything just started falling into place for us to go ahead and move.
Something I love about the Lord is how He leads me through life, especially in times like this. I pray and ask Him what He wants and most of the time, He shows me. I don’t always love His answer and don’t always trust Him, but He's never let me down. He knows what is good for me better than I know for myself!
We started praying about if we should move a while back and felt lead to just put our house on the market and see what would happen. So we did and said, “Lord, this is up to you. If you want us to stay, don’t let our house sell right away. If you want us to consider change, please make it sell.” So we left town on a Friday after putting it on the market and already had an offer before we came back on Sunday. Hello, answer.
I truly believe that what we ask God and how we respond is key. If we ask for one specific answer, we may find ourselves being disappointed. He may have a different plan. It’s okay to ask for specific things, but know that He has a much better view of your future than you do and knows what is best for you. I always ask Him for what I want but more importantly, ask Him to show us what His will in all of it and to help us trust Him in it.
So here I am…following a series of events after selling the house, we are moved to a new city, about to start new jobs, looking for a new church, and looking to make new friends. My life has been crazy since quitting my job….it has not been restful as it might sound. I’ve had interviews, have been trying to find somewhere to live, seeing family, traveled 11 hours to see my hubby’s grandpa and am helping my sister plan her wedding. I haven’t had a moment to stop and relax.
Good news! I accepted a job and am starting October 27 so I’m pumped! I think it’ll be a great job and the team seems pretty awesome. Thankfully, I have some time to rest before then.
So before I had quit my previous job, I thought, “this is going to be great. I’m going to be stress-free!” Ha! How is it than once we move on from one stress-inducer, we find a million others to stress about? I’m starting to realize that it’s what is in my heart. Even when things are going well and God seems to be pushing things along perfectly, anxiety seems to find me (or I find it?). Will I like my new job? Will I make friends in San Antonio? Will I like San Antonio? Will my friends in DFW forget about me? Will we find a church we love as much as our previous one?
As hard as I try to not be anxious, I can’t seem to let it go. In my time with the Lord lately, He has told me to stop trying. Stop trying to find relief myself, but allow Him to give me peace. We’ve been trusting Him in the details, the baby steps, yet I let worry creep into my heart. Worry about the unknown.
I know that I’m where God wants me to be. I’m excited about the future. My prayer the other day as I walked through a peaceful neighborhood talking to God was that He would give me peace in each moment, that I would stop and enjoy time with Him, time with my husband, time with my family, time alone and not worry about what will happen in my new job or with our future. What does worrying do for my future? Nothing. It doesn’t change a thing.
I am happy with this change. I’m excited to make new friends and find a new church. It sounds so easy to say or read about someone else, but it’s my life. It’s huge for me. Thank you for loving me though this process, blog friends!